When You Wonder

From noon until three, darkness came over the land...about three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eli, Eli lema sabachthani?" (which means, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?") -Matthew 27:46 (NIV)

I see it almost every single day, sometimes in my own life. You know what I'm talking about: a period so dark, when things are so tough, that even the strongest people of faith question God's presence and purpose. Perhaps you're going through such a period right now. Job loss. Troubled children. Rocky relationship. Financial woes. Faith crisis. Declining health. Despite what the clock on the wall says, perhaps it's your three o'clock in the afternoon (see the scripture reference above) and you find yourself screaming out at the top of your lungs: "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"

I wish that darkness never came over the land or over your life, but I will have to say this: I've learned things in the darkness that I would have never learned anywhere else. I would have preferred to have learned these lessons another way, but I doubt that I could or that I would. I have also come to realize that I cling to my faith even more when darkness comes, leaning not on my own strength but on God's.

I take comfort in knowing that Jesus asked some of the same questions of God that I ask when darkness comes. I take comfort in knowing that Christ would have preferred avoiding the darkness ("Father, take this cup from me") just like me. I take comfort in knowing that God has a track record of taking the darkest moments of life and using them for glory and growth.

When you wonder, when you question God's presence and purpose, may God grant you the grace to believe that there is nowhere you can go that God is not. When darkness comes, I pray that you'll cling to Christ and that you'll see glimpses of growth and glory.

If you're interested in reading through the Bible, tomorrow's readings are 2 Samuel 19-20, Psalm 55, andMatthew 28.